All I can do is shake my head and wonder where you're getting your ideas about men. “A key part of male bonding is denigrating women?” What??!! I suspect, despite being a man, that there's no way I can convince you that this take is insane. But the kind of men this is true of, and they are not even close to a majority, are easy to spot.

I feel like you've been sold on an absolute caricature of masculinity. Which, to be fair, I often find when I talk to women who have learned about men primarily from other women.

Not for nothing, but it shares many hallmarks with the caricature of women I hear from men who have learned about women primarily from other men. Usually, sadly, from the Andrew Tate's of the world.

But the interesting disparity here is that there is nobody calling out the women peddling this nonsense about masculinity. I don't think there's a single woman, and some women say truly awful things about men, who has ever been called out by the culture for her simplistic, misandrist takes about men.

Meanwhile, I see women objectifying men all the time. I've experienced it personally numerous times. Including when I was just a teenager. Violence, body shaming, mockery of sexual assault. Women engage in this too. it's just deemed irrelevant. Or justified by "the patriarchy." But for the men who experience it and are ignored, it isn't irrelevant.

I don't know how much clearer I can be that I've understood your point. There is racism and sexism in systems and unconscious biases. Yes. 100% agreed. What I think is silly is you motte-and-bailey-ing between this reasonable position and the "All men are fighting tooth and nail to uphold this/I don't fucking care what men go through/every individual with a penis needs to "man up" and fix society through some means that I'm never quite going to specify" position.

I'm all for confronting those systems. What I'm not for is "confronting" them in ways that are obviously counterproductive. Ways that promote resentment and blame instead of healing and understanding. But again, if you want understanding, you have to be willing to listen. Because right now, please believe me when I say, you appear to have zero understanding of what the average man's life is like.