I didn't say this though. I said that trans people represent a change to the way that many people think about it, not that people haven't ever thought about it. That's very different. Men know they're men, women know they're women, and both have expectations placed on them based on this (I'm not arguing that men's burden is as heavy as women's, simply that men don't get off scott free in the way many women seem to assume).

As for women being looked at with suspicion in the ladies bathrooms, I mention this too. In fact, that's the central point in my argument that women's bathrooms are segregated by gender (or if you prefer traditional femininity) and not by biological sex. I'm not making a value judgement on that, just pointing out the fact. I'm obviously not suggesting that you should have to use the men's bathroom. Again, the problem with conflating femaleness with femininity is the central point of the article. Many people don't consider that women who aren't traditionally feminine also find themselves caught up in gender policing.

I wish I had a neat answer to all this, but I'm not sure there is one. There's literally no way to cater to everybody. I'm just suggesting that we'd make more progress if we spoke about it rationally and precisely.