😄 I'm not sure we'll ever get hard data on something this subjective. But I didn't say that fetishisation was rare, I said the extreme forms of it were rare. The "I only like this thing and nothing else" forms are rare.

The point I'm making is, attraction is, by definition, discriminatory. We select people with certain traits and reject people without them. It's also a form of unconscious bias. We all have it, none of us choose it, we can't change it (without enormous effort at least).

There are plenty of men and women who "like black guys". Why is this a problem? If we're going to have a relationship, of course they'll need to see me as a complete human being. Those who don't are generally gross and also easy to spot. But at the same time, the physical aspect of attraction is about my appearance. If they find the colour of my skin appealing, what's inherently wrong with that?

I still struggle to see how this is different to you finding a particular hair colour appealing.