Oof, yeah, I have to say, I think South Africa is a whole different animal. I was there a couple of years ago and the effects of apartheid are still so stark. The shanty towns where so many black people live on the outskirts of cities in poverty. The beautiful houses where white people (and tourists like myself) live surrounded by high walls and security cameras. The fact that I was the only black customer in restaurants (staffed almost entirely by black wait staff) whenever I went out to eat. On and on. The racial disparity is pretty shocking to people who weren't raised in it.

So I hate to say it, I really do, but I can understand the distrust towards white people in South Africa a lot more easily. Your situation there is very different to the situation in today's America or in the rest of the world. You're still basically right in the middle of your own version of Jim Crow. I think you're a generation or two (and a lot of determined, difficult reform) from being able to reasonably expect black South Africans to look past something so horrific when it only BEGAN to end thirty years ago. Time is an important factor in that healing.