Unrelated, but it's almost unspeakably creepy that you're a man calling yourself Emily with a picture of two women in your profile picture. Maybe don't do that dude.

As for your use of the n-word, I personally don't care if you use it, but you have to understand that some people do. Then you have to decide if your desire to use it is more important than their feelings about it.

I wrote this piece to address black people's feelings about the word. But that doesn't mean that you shouldn't consider those feelings when deciding what words you're going to use.